My Personal War
by TheBloodyBlackRabbit
Summary: The Civil War is raging Alices brothers are off fighting for the north. when one comes home without the other Alice takes it upon herself to find him, by joinign the war. When death threatens can Alice do the one thing to stay alive join the enemy Human
1. Chapter 1

I looked up from my chores in time to see the wagon coming up the road. Raising from my stool beside Betty, our cow, I watched the wagon come to a stop in front of the house.

The year was 1863, the Civil War had been raging for two years and it had torn my family apart.

My name is Alice Brandon; I was born and raised here in Ohio on our family farm. I have a younger brother, and an older one, both are off fighting in the war.

My older brother Edward is my favorite he always seemed to understand me the most. I also liked his fiancée Isabella; we all normally just call her Bella.

My younger brother, Emmett, is just a pain in the butt but that might be why I love him so much. He's already off and married to Rosalie. They don't live all that far away, so I go over there often to visit.

Even though I was born here in Ohio my both parents, Carlisle and Esme, had lived in the South. Due to pride and foolishness, we have been disowned and ostracized from both families because my parents believed that the rest of the states should be free states.

Is it wrong to believe you should work for your own bread and not have other people do it for you? Apparently my Grandfather thinks so.

My brothers both signed up for the war as soon as the drafts started in Ohio, some days I can still hear the fight that had broken out between Rose and Emmett. Even though Rose is proud of Emmett for fighting, this was no time to go off and fight a war just recently married.

Bella took it better and promised to wait faithfully for Edwards return. I missed my brothers, but someone had to do the chores. Some days I think the only reason Edward signed up for the war was to get away from the chores.

Esme's cries brought me out of my revere, I ran over to the wagon. Grabbing the edge I hoisted myself so I could see into the bed. "EDWARD!" I yelled.

Jumping into the bed I quickly scooped my brother's head into my arms.

"Hey kid." Was the week reply.

Looking down I saw a bandage around his mid section and one around his shoulder. "What happened?" I whispered.

"Got a little close to a cannon explosion, sent me flying into a fence that thought it would be cool to stick through my shoulder and tear up my side.

"Don't worry the doctors said it missed everything important. I lost a lot of blood and won't be able to hold a gun for a while so they decided to send me home."

I cried silent tears and hugged him closer "I wished you home but I didn't wish it like this."

"Don't worry about it, give me a couple of weeks and I'll be up around the farm with you."

"NOT if I have my way with it."

Edward and me shared a smile then together we looked up to see Bella scrambling into the back of the wagon. I let go of Edward and moved so Bella could get close.

"Edward Brandon you promised not to come home in a casket, this is cutting way to close…." I gave Edward another smile and hopped out of the wagon.

Carlisle and Paul, a stable hand, got Edward out of the wagon as softly as they could but it was hard getting around Bella who won't let go of Edwards's hand.

The rest of the afternoon went by in a flurry of skirts and blankets. We made up a bed in the kitchen so Edward didn't have to climb up the latter to his old bed. Then Esme made dinner and eventually shoed everyone home or to bed so Edward could sleep.

I lay awake waiting for my chance to have Edward alone. When I finally heard Esme go to bed I slipped down the latter.

Tip toeing over to Edward I whispered "Are you still awake?"

"Of course I knew you would be down."

I could hear the mirth in his voice as well as the pain. Coming closer I sat on the floor by Edwards head "Where is he?"

I didn't have to specify Edward knew I meant Emmett; they had been in the same regiment.

"I don't know" the pain in Edward's voice constricted my throat

"They wouldn't let me look for him, just shipped me home. I don't know if he's alive or dead."

I bit my lip, no not Emmett he had to be alive. He couldn't be dead he has a wife and a boy that he has yet to meet. Grabbing Edward's hand I whispered "I'm going to go find him."

"No!" Was the harsh answer.

"Edward I have to, you know that. He's my little brother. Also I've never felt so useless sitting here waiting for you two to come home.

"I'm going I've been thinking about this for a long time and now its time for me to act. You take care of Bella and Mom you understand."

"Alice please, don't do this. I know what it's like out there I don't want you….please Alice."

"I have to Edward you know me all ambition no sense."

"War is no place for a woman, let alone my sister."

I leaned over and kissed Edwards cheek "I love you Edward Brandon remember that. Don't worry I'll come home."

"I'll stop you" It was a week threat and he knew it.

"You want to know as much as I do and this is the only way. Don't worry I'll find Emmett promise." I got up and quickly climbed the latter.

In the loft I used to share with my brothers I pulled out a pair of scissors from my sowing kit. Taking them I began cutting at my hair, I couldn't see what I was doing but I figured it would be good enough.

Then grabbing Edward extra uniform I had swiped from downstairs I slipped into it. Of course my chest would be an issue but I had been working on binding it for a while, it was uncomfortable at first but I was used to it now.

Strapping Edwards pack on to my back I went back down stairs.

"Alice" Edward called quietly.

Going over to him I took his hand again. "Be careful Alice and bring you both home, alive."

"Thank you Edward and I will."

"Remember on thing, don't hesitate. If the only way to live is to shoot, then shoot ,or to run then run. You can do it Alice, you were always the better shoot of the three of us and me and Emmett were the two best in our regiment."

I smile at the compliment "Good bye Edward."

"Goodbye Alice." Going to the door I grabbed Edward's gun, opening the door I left.

Edward's point of view

I woke up the next morning, praying that what had transpired last night hadn't happened, but one look to the door confirmed it.

My gun was gone; Alice had taken my place in the war. I sighed, I should have stopped her but then again she still would have left. Better to have left on good terms than on bad.

I heard mother come back down the latter asking Carlisle where Alice was.

"She's gone." I said.

Carlisle and Esme came into my view. "What do you means she's gone?" Esme asked.

I sighed 'You owe me big time Alice.' "She went after Emmett. I don't know where he is, she went to go find him."

"How?" Carlisle asked. I could see in his eyes he was praying I wouldn't answer how I was going to.

"She's joining the war."

Esme screamed and Carlisle swore, I closed my eyes and prayed 'Please come home Alice, please come home.'

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

_What can I say, I've always wanted to do this! Not just write about it, it has been a secret dream of mine to run off to war disguised as a man, breaking all unwritten rules about women, being different, and having an adventure. *sigh* Too bad we have modern technology and a society that supports different women. Oh well this will have to do ____. Read and Review, or just enjoy which ever you prefer to do._


	2. Chapter 2

Joining the war was easier than I thought it was going to be, after hunting down a group of soldiers I just lied that I was twenty and they gave me a tent and supplies.

I didn't get a chance to truly settle in, because we were shipped out the next day. They needed troops down in Texas, so we were being sent to reinforce.

Sitting on the train, I kept my distance from the guys. I didn't know what else to do; anyone of them could discover my secret I couldn't take that chance.

I did talk around a little bit to see if any knew of Emmett. The first few people I asked didn't know, but then I got lucky. One of the older soldiers, Jonathan, had seen Emmett just before the battle that sent Edward home.

"I remember the lad, he was a big fellow, and had the arrogance about him that made him even more dangerous than some of the oldest soldiers. Made a name for himself for being the meanest fighter to come from Ohio."

"Do you know what happened to him after the battle?" I asked pitching my voice low so it didn't carry that distinct soprano that it normally held.

Jonathan gave me a gentle smile; like most he believe I was just an ambitious young boy who wanted in the war, "No, though it was rumored he lived.

"I don't know, but I can almost guarantee that if he did live he would have been shipped to Texas to hold the front down there. He could probably hold it single-handed, Emmett could.

"If not I would guarantee he is probably in some prison camp, his body would have been easy to identify and given a proper burial."

As he fell silent I contemplated what he had said, there was hope at least. Emmett was one that would be hard to miss on the field, my heart warmed at the thought that he was alive.

"So lad, who are you and how do you know Emmett so well?" Jonathan broke me from revere.

I quickly thought "I grew up in his village; he was always like a big brother to me. When his brother came home and he didn't I…well I needed to find him."

Jonathan nodded, then frowned "A noble heart you have boy, or do you have a name I can call you by?"

My mind raced "Allen, Allen Bryce."

"Allen Bryce, you have a large task ahead of you. I do hope that you succeed."

I lowered my head and then just stared out the window.

Jonathan and I talk some more, he was so nice he didn't ask anything that I didn't want to share.

Soon we could tell that we were in Texas, the land was so baron and dry. Even the air told; it was so dry and hot.

We eventually arrived at our destination. I shook from nerves, as we formed our ranks I glanced quickly from side to side. I hadn't gotten a good look at me in my new appearance, but I trusted that I looked much the same as the rest.

"Alright men lets move out it's a good twenty miles to our post, lets move." We started off down the road; the walk was long and hot.

Many of the men removed their uniform tops, and their undershirts. I ducked my head and blushed. Jonathan moved me so that I was on the outside of the ranks so it was hard for me to see the men.

"It can be intimidating for a one as young as you."

I just nodded and let Jonathan believe in that.

We reached the camp around dusk, Jonathan set up his tent near mine, and when I struggled with trying to hook the canvas, because I was too short he helped me. Heading to the meal wagon, we got our dinner.

I never cared much for beans at home, but I forced it down. Eating as quickly as possible I rinsed my dishes and headed to bed.

We didn't do anything for the next two days; we did formations and worked on recognizing the different drum commands.

One day they had shooting practice, Edward was right the Brandon's are one of the best shoots around. I hit every target and at least half of them were bull's eyes.

Everyone else hit three quarts of the targets and a fourth of those were bull's eyes, but this is war so bull's eyes don't count as much as living to see the next battle does.

On the third day we were order to pack up. As we were tearing down tents I asked Jonathan "What's going on?"

"Well Allen, they've spotted a Southern camp not far from here we're going to go see what we can do."

My hand shook slightly, my first battle what would it be like. "Don't think about it, trust me its better." I looked into Jonathan's knowing eyes and nodded, it probably would be.

Heading out we no more than topped the hill and started rounding a bend when the drums rang out.

"What!" I screamed while everyone around me began pulling out bayonets and attaching them to their muskets.

"They must have been waiting for us. Get your gun ready Allen." Jonathan pushed me down onto one knee while I finished putting my bayonet on, over my head he fired a shot.

I heard a cry looking behind me I say a boy younger than me fall to the ground a pool of blood growing underneath him. His drum rolled down the road, all I could do was watch it roll.

"Come on Allen don't freeze on me now!" Jonathan retched me my feet, loading his gun again.

We were behind the curve in the road and the fighting had not quite made it us yet. I lifted my gun to my shoulder and took aim, but I froze again could I take a life?

I shook for a second then I remembered Edward's words "Don't hesitate." Looking down my sight again I made my decision I fired taking the leg out from underneath a charging soldier.

I would not kill unless I had to. Grimly I loaded again and took another guy down. I didn't get a chance to load once more for the enemy had broken through the lines.

Gripping my gun I swung it up so the butt hit the guy in the face, knocking him to the ground.

Bringing it back in front of me I thrust it forwarded into another guys shoulder. I pulled it free but I didn't have enough room to prepare for the next guy he was almost on top of me.

Holding my gun horizontal I blocked his attempt to stab me, but I fell under the pressure. It stinks being only five foot; you are at a definite disadvantage.

The guy raised his bayonet again giving me just enough room to stab him in the gut that sent him tumbling on top of me. He was heavy, grunting I tried to get out from under him but I couldn't.

I finally wrestled the guy off me enough that I could roll out when a shadow feel across my face, looking up I saw Jonathan.

"I'm sorry kid but I have to make sure you make it home." With that he brought the butt of his gun down on my head, my world went black.


	3. Chapter 3

I woke up confused. It was dark out and I could hear moans all around me. Struggling I sat up; my world tilted then righted its self.

Blinking my eyes I began crawling forward, suddenly I fell across a body. I gasped as the moon came out from behind a cloud revealing Jonathan's face.

"Jonathan" I whispered shaking from fear. He gave a small gasp and his eyes focused on me.

"You're alive, good. I had hoped they assume you dead in the position you were in. I promised Emmett that I would do as much." His breath shuddered slightly.

My mind was slow but I focused in on Emmett. "What do you mean?"

Jonathan laughed weekly "Emmett told me about his little sister and how she was so ambitious that nothing could stop her once her mind was made up.

"She was small, but she looked like she should be grown with three kids around her. She had the nicest shade of black hair, and a small scar right behind her left ear."

I touched the little scar Emmett had accidentally given me daring me to walk on the roof of the barn. I had fallen off into a hay stack but not before I hit my head on the gutter of the barn.

"He's alive Alice, and he's somewhere in Texas. I had promised to see that you were sent home, but that boy needs to go home too. Recently married he should be there not out here.

"When I met you I knew my job would be impossible anyway. Just like Emmett said it would be.

"You bring him home Alice you can do it, and don't worry, if I hadn't been looking for you I would have just thought you were some boy excited by the war. Take care and bring him home." With that Jonathan breathed his last.

"Jonathan" I whispered again shaking him.

He didn't respond. I shook with sobs I wanted to release, but I couldn't.

Emmett was here in Texas, I had to find him. Jonathan had given me that, stupid Emmett thinking he could stop me.

I pushed myself up to my feet; I still swayed but kept on my feet. Walking a couple of steps I heard voices. Crouching down low I ran for a nearby tree.

"Here's one better get him back fast he's on the brink." The voice was cold and hard. Suddenly a cry sounded then died.

"Find another Yankee still breathing?"

"Yeah they never seem to want to die."

I shivered what was I going to do.

"Check up by that tree over yonder. Even though we wiped out this regiment doesn't mean that there aren't some waiting to ambush us."

The whole regiment was whipped out. I shook, what could I do? If they found me I would be killed on sight. Looking near by I saw the boy Jonathan shot.

'No!' I thought as an idea popped in my mind. 'I can't do that.' Then I heard the soldier behind me getting closer, it was my only hope to live.

I had to join the enemy.

Quickly I struggled out of my uniform and stripped the boy of his. I had just gotten the shirt buttoned when the soldier came around the tree.

"Whoa there who are you?"

I grabbed my head, I didn't know what to say and my head hurt.

"Hey there kid let me take a look at that." He lifted my head and began inspecting it. "You're not from around these parts are you?"

I opened my mouth to replay then I realized how different I would sound. I wasn't from the south, would that give me away? I began to shake a little from fear.

"Hey Anthony I got a boy over here with a head injury. I think he's going into shock, I'm taking him back to camp." The next thing I knew my gun was being thrown over his shoulder, and I was scooped off the ground.

I tried to think of what I could do, there was no hiding my lack of a Southern accent. I would sound like a Yankee, gulping I tried to think of something while the soldier carried me away.

We were approaching the camp now, I tried to think faster but my brain wouldn't move. 'What would Edward do?'

Suddenly I was being laid on a bed and a pair of cold hands began inspecting my head. "Young isn't he?" the man looking at my head commented.

"Yep but we could use all the soldiers we can get. Even the Yankee ones."

My mind reeled; they had northerners on their side. I slapped my head, I had completely forgotten Keble, his family had been southerners but had moved north due to the parents feeling on slaves.

Yet Keble still felt loyal to the south because of his heritage, so he went and joined the southern army. That's right.

"Don't do that kid or you'll make it worse." The soldier who had found me grabbed my hand and pushed it back to my side.

"He's going to be fine, but keep waking him up just to be sure." The doctor started to inspect my side, but I quickly sat up.

The solider who found me laughed "Don't worry doc, I didn't see any blood just a head injury. Probably didn't patch up his uniform from the last fight. Alright kid lets go find your tent."

I waited a second for my head to stop spinning, then hopped of the table. I would have to step up here, now not only was I a female, but a northern in disguise.

I laughed I wasn't even interested in winning this war I just wanted to find Emmett, granted I wanted slavery ended I didn't think war was the way to do it. Oh well just keep in mind my mission is to find Emmett that's all I need to remember.

I followed the soldier out of the med tent, and down rows of tents. "They are rearranging sleeping conditions, due to our losses. I'll go talk to the Major to see where you're going to sleep at."

I nodded still not yet sure of my voice.

"Major Whitlock!" The soldier yelled and jogged up to a man just about to go into his tent.

The man stopped and turned to us. I felt my mouth almost drop open.

He was gorgeous. He had honey blond hair and the prettiest sky blue eyes I've ever seen. He was also tall and each angle of his face seemed perfect.

'STOP' I screamed at myself. I ducked my head so I was no longer looking at him, I can't have these thoughts he's not only the enemy but I'm pretending to be a guy.

I struggled in silence while the soldier asked where I was to be stationed. Major Whitlock looked thoughtful for a second.

"Truth be told Privet Douse, all the tents are almost filled. What's your name boy?"

I gave a start when I realized he was addressing me. "Allen sir, Allen Bryce."

"Privet Allen Bryce…haven't heard of you yet, did you just join?"

"Yes sir."

Major Whitlock nodded "Well like I said most of the tents are filled with the injured, and a few were destroyed by the Yankees that got through our lines."

He looked like he was contemplating something; finally he just shrugged "He'll stay with me Privet Douse."


	4. Chapter 4

"But sir you're a Major you don't have to sleep with him if you don't want to. I'll take him into my own tent, sir."

Major Whitlock gave a rueful smile, "Douse you know me, I'm only a soldier as well. Being Major can be kind of lonely I think I might enjoy the company."

While this whole exchange was going on my eyes kept getting bigger and bigger, I couldn't room with him, that would be indecent and horrible and… I stopped myself there to everyone else I was a boy, this would be an honor and a privilege.

Maybe he would change his mind and set me up with Douse that would be better than being with this angel. I almost started to beg to be with him, when I saw Douse running off to get me a cot. I was stuck.

"Well come on in Privet Bryce." Major Whitlock pushed the canvas back so I could duck in.

I could see that it was going to be real cozy here, I swore in my head.

"Once the cot gets here you'll sleep on that side, I'll see if I can find another empty box so you can have a table. Is that all you have Privet Bryce?"

I looked over my shoulder at the pack; luckily I had been able to grab that before I was whisked away. It was all I had of Edward, besides his gun. I nodded, not looking at him.

"You know I joined the war when I was 16, pretending to be twenty."

I nodded still not looking at him.

"Listen Allen, my I call you that?"

I nodded again then decided to give him some slack, he was trying to be nice, in a small voice I said "Yes sir."

"Call me Jasper, I know it's not very military, but truth be told I really don't like being called Major Whitlock all the time."

"Major I have the cot." Douse's voice sounded outside.

Jasper, no I must think of him as Major Whitlock, moved the flap and let Douse maneuver the cot into the tent. Once the cot was in place Douse left and I walked over to it.

"Get some sleep I need to go check on some things, but it's been a long day." I heard the canvas rustle; glancing behind me I saw I was alone. Sitting on the cot I just wanted to go to sleep but first I had to get a new uniform.

"Hey kid got a uniform here for you." I stuck my head out the tent and found Douse holding a grey uniform out to me.

"I noticed that yours was a little beat up, so I found you one, I hope it fits. They don't make many your size you know."

I gave a small smile and thanked Douse. He was so nice. Ducking back into my tent I changed quickly, always looking over my shoulder praying that Jasper, Major Whitlock wouldn't walk through the door.

Finally I was in my uniform it was a little long only in the sleeves and in the legs, but it bagged in all the right places to hid my woman figure. After I was sure that everything was secure, I curled up on my cot.

It had been a long day, but I couldn't sleep quite yet. I thought of Jonathan and how he had died saving me. With out my permission two tears slide down my checks.

Emmett Brandon you had better still be alive or I will haunt your ghost so help me.

I awoke unsure of where I was. I was in a tent but instead of hearing Jonathan's soft singing in the tent next to me I heard the rustling of clothes being put on.

Glancing over my shoulder I saw Jasper setting up a shaving mirror in the back of the tent, I quickly lowered my head and closed my eyes tight.

I did not just see him half naked, I did NOT just see him half naked. I continued to repeat that to myself, but the image of his flat abs and broad chest continued to flash in my mind.

Finally I couldn't take it anymore I sat up and scooted to the end of my bed with my back to him.

"Good Morning Allen."

"Morning" I muttered.

"You ok? I woke you up like the doctor prescribed, but you didn't seem all that awake to me." He chuckled at the memory.

I didn't answer I was throwing my things in my bag as fast as possible. "Allen what is wrong?"

"Nothing." I quickly got up and left the tent, the first thing I did was head to a near by tree line.

Luckily being new no one knew me and so no one stopped me. I reached the tree line and broke into a run. Panting I came to a stop in the middle of the woods. Catching my breath I cringed at what he must think of me.

Oh well while I'm out here might as well relieve myself. After doing my business I headed back to camp. Keeping my eyes on the ground I grabbed some food and sat on the outside of a group.

"Have you heard, the Bear is somewhere here in Texas?"

"Really? I won't mind pitting myself against him, bet he's nothing just all bluff."

"Naw I heard that he was everything and more. He's as big a small black bear, with mussels like brown, and the roar of a grizzly. No one mess with him."

"He's a Yankee, all Yankee are yellow bellied in the end."

"Not Emmett Brandon, Not the Bear."

I froze with my fork in my mouth, Emmett. I shifted so that I could listen better.

"So where do you think he is?" The man was young and very unkempt, his yellow hair went every which way and he had a scruffy beard starting.

"Well I heard rumor that he's in this area, but then again that could be just wishful thinking." This man was more well kept and had a light brown hair.

"It's not men." Jasper sat next to me, 'Darn it might as well just give it up' I thought. I quickly tuned back into Jasper.

"I have just gotten word from headquarters; the Bear has been spotted in this area. We may not get to see him, but we do have an assignment. There is a Yankee base not far from here, we're going to go take it."

The conversation switched to battle plans, I fidgeted. I wanted to know about Emmett, but to be overly curious could easily ruin me.

Instead I found myself studying Jasper; he did have a way with the men. Everyone was relaxed around him, and he kept everything real with them. He deserved the title of Major.

I lowered my eyes as I felt a blush cover my face. I can't be doing this, standing up I walked away from everyone. Grabbing my gun I headed to the shooting ranges.

Loading I ran my hand over the inscription on the barrel 'When life gives you lemons feed them to Alice.'

It had been the little joke between the three of us, I was always smiling and the only thing that seemed to break it was lemons. They were also my favorite fruit, so when ever they could Edward and Emmett would buy me lemons then watch me eat them laughing at my face.

Raising the gun to my shoulder I sighted and fired. The tin can fell, walking over I saw that the bullet had hit dead center.

"Nice work." Startled I dropped the can and turned around. Jasper stood looking at me.

"Thanks" I said lowering my head.

"You're pretty good, where did you learn?"

"My brothers taught me." At least it wasn't a lie, another reason I hated talking to people.

"I couldn't help but see the inscription on your barrel, what does it mean."

I started to explain that it was a joke between me and my brothers, then realized that I wasn't Alice anymore. Swallowing I tried again "My sister Alice, loves to smile. It's about the only thing that she does sometimes.

"Well to completely contradict that she loves lemons, and their about the only thing that can break the smile from her face."

Jasper chuckled "She seems like an interesting girl, how old is she?"

I did a quick calculation in my mind, its sad I don't know my own age, but give me a break I have to pretend that I'm twenty.

"17." I answered then shouldering my gun I began to walk.

Jasper fell into step with me, darn it I was hoping he could take a hint. "You said brothers, how many do you have?"

"Two."

"Older or younger?"

"One older and one younger." 'Does he ever SHUT UP?!' (Not like Jasper, I know but don't forget he doesn't have a terrible past now. So SUCK IT UP!)

"And where does Alice fit into all this."

Shoot where would I fit in now that I had an invisible brother. "Younger." I stated. Yes that would be right if I'm 'twenty' and she's 'seventeen' she would be younger, no wait I would be I'm so confused.

Seeing a straw bale near by I sat down on it and pulled out some oils and a rag from my bag. I started cleaning my gun, and Jasper sat next to me. I bit my lip 'What more could he want to know!'

"Where are you from?"

Where could I be from almost anywhere, but before I could think of anywhere else I replied "Ohio." Great now he knows I'm a Yankee.

"What brought you to join the southern army?"

He believed me?! Then again they're desperate aren't they. "Well my family originated in the South, at least my parents and I felt obligated to fight for my heritage." I began concentrating hard on cleaning my gun.

"So you support the southern ideal, how did your parents take that?"

I snorted still more concentrated on my gun than on the conversation "I didn't say I supported what the South 'believes', just that I fight out of loyalty to my family." Shoot, I stopped cleaning my gun, now I'm going to be found out for sure if he's guessed it.

I opened my mouth to admit that I wasn't really fighting for the south, but I was cut off by Jasper.

"Don't worry about defending yourself, if that is what you believe then that is your belief. I didn't join the war because of slavery, I just wanted to fight. A lame reason I would say now."

"Not lame" I began cleaning my gun again "I hated sitting at home while my older brother went out to fight. My parents tried to tell me to wait, but I couldn't wait anymore.

"When my younger brother ran off and my older brother came back, I had to go out there. My parents are probably at their wits end right now but I have to find my brother and I can't do that sitting at home now can I?

"Besides it's a two for one I find my brother, and I contribute to a cause and put an ease to my restlessness."

Beside me Jasper shifted so that his feet stretched into my view, why did he have to be so tall?

"You have some insight there Allen. Tell me, most boys who run off to war act purely on the spur of the moment, but you think things through. Where did you pick that up at?"

"My older brother, he was always so practical. Even though I thought him stuffy at one time I also learned to value his look on things. I guess he's the one that keeps me going here."

"Is that his gun?"

I nodded as I put my rags and oil away. Standing up I thought about going back to my tent or something.

"Don't go too far we plan on breaking camp in about an hour. We march in two."

I finally looked at Jasper "Where are we going?"

"To battle."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

_OOOO you guys are so lucky, I seriously considered putting the conversation between Alice and Jasper into a completely different chapter but then I talked myself out of it. It just ended to perfectly to cut it in half. Well R&R!_


	5. Chapter 5

I never knew any place could be so hot, but Texas was. Jasper had me walk in the shade of his horse after he saw I refused to take my uniform off.

It was almost comical the fact that I fit in the shade of that stupid horse, man I was short. For the most part we marched in silence, but after a while we began to talk again.

"Allen do you have any question for me? I've been bombarding you all day, it's your turn."

I glanced up at Jasper and only one question came to mind "Do you have a girl at home?" I mentally kicked myself, I must be suffering from heat stroke or something.

Jasper just laughed "Nope like I said I left young, so I was never much interested in girls. How about you do you have a girl at home?"

"No." I said it a little too sharply at the horrendousness of the thought. Then remembering I wasn't Alice, I amended. "No none of the girls looked my way much."

"Well now when you come home with war stories and a uniform the girls will fall before you." Jasper joked, I grimaced 'I hope not.'

Then I started laughing at the absurdity of the thought. Jasper laughed beside me, he had such a deep laugh. I stopped so that I could listen to it. Jasper eventually stopped and I was disappointed.

"Well we might just have to continue that thought later now its time to set up camp." Breaking away Jasper gave the order to stop and camp.

The next week past much the same, Jasper pulling information from me, and me asking question here and there. He was actually really nice, and unbeknownst to others very subconscious.

Being a young officer he didn't think he was doing all that great of job. The night he admitted that I had to sit on my hand so that I didn't wrap them around him in comfort.

It seemed like a losing battle, the more I resisted my feeling for Jasper the more they grew. Some days it was hard to be around him because I felt so bad bending the truth like I was.

One day we marched up a hill, a lull in the conversation we were just having. Cresting the hill I could see another army across the way.

Jasper raised his hand signaling a halt. "It looks like this band of rebels wishes to stop us." He commented to me "But they will soon see they are nothing. Douse, Burgiuse go and check out what we have over there."

I watched as both soldiers disappeared in to the shadows. Jasper then dismounted to stand by me "Looks like the battle came to us. If I'm right this is the band of northerners we were suppose to find and eliminate."

I shuddered at the words meaning.

Jasper looked down at me "Don't worry prisoners are taken, but we do our best to let none survive."

We lapsed into silence waiting for Douse and Burgiuse to come back. After what seemed like hours they trotted up to Jasper.

"It's Yankees alright but it doesn't have the Bear in it."

"Pity that would have been a fine addition to this. Douse go off the Colonel and tell him. Wait for his orders then get back here as fast as you can."

I didn't know whether I should sigh in relief or growl in frustration, Emmett was proving to be difficult like he always is.

My head snapped up at the sound of my name "Privet Bryce, the Colonel wishes for us to attack I want you to take a position up in a tree."

I gave Jasper a funny look.

He smiled "You're the finest sharp shooter we have, I'd rather you pick off the enemy rather than have the enemy trample you."

I made a face at the last comment "I can handle myself thank you."

Jasper just smiled and pointed to the tree "It's an order solider."

I scowled at being protected in such a fashion, but inside I was grateful. I remembered my first battle, how I was knocked over so easily. Heaving myself up onto the lowest branch, I loaded my gun.

The sun was just two hours from setting it was either going to be a quick battle or a drawn out one. The signal came from our side, I mentally noted that this band of Southerners were aggressive they would rather charge right in rather than test the waters.

I watched as the Union soldiers were scrambling on their horse, I prayed that I would be forgiven for what I had to do.

As they started down the hill I took aim at one of the officers. To kill a snake cut of its head, Emmett taught me that when I was cornered by blue streak once.

Taking a breath I held it, counting my heart beats one two three four five, I fired. Dropping my gun I began loading it by memory watching as the officer fell off his horse grabbing his thigh.

I prayed that he wouldn't be mimed for life, but it was better than dieing here. Bringing my gun back up, I took aim at the next in command. One two three four five, he went down.

Of course someone noticed what was going on, and sent a small band of soldiers my way. "Great" I muttered.

Pulling my gun back up I began picking off the group, but I couldn't seem to keep up. There were two more to go, I couldn't load fast enough to hit either so I dropped from the tree fixing my bayonet.

Just as I secured it, I had just enough time to deflect the first guys thrust. Of course it didn't kill me but it slide across my side. Hissing I shoved against the guy and shouldered him in the gut.

That sent him stumbling backwards, I turned to face the other guy but found his bayonet already coming down toward me. Suddenly the guy fell over, Jasper was behind him pulling his sword out of his back.

"Get back in the tree Allen we need your fire." Then Jasper turned and finished off the other guy just getting up.

Loading my gun I fired once at a charging Calvary man and started scrambling into the tree. Getting there I loaded my gun and began another bombardment on the officers. I had been firing for who knows how long the sun was setting and it was getting harder to see around me.

As I loaded my gun for what felt like the hundredth time, I scanned the field. Not far from my tree I saw Jasper, his horse was trapped amongst a group of soldiers who were keeping just far enough back to be out of the way of Jasper's sword but were close enough to cut Jasper.

"Jasper!" I yelled. Hoping from the tree I ran toward the group, along the way I freed up soldiers, directing them toward Jasper.

Soon a group of five men were following me down the field, to our trapped Major. I stopped a few feet from the group and fired the shoot left in my gun. Charging in, it became chaos.

I didn't know who I fought, except that I fought anything with blue on it. Dodging the horses step by slipping under it I began hitting on the group on the other side.

Soon Jasper was able to break his horse free, and begin hitting them from the back side. When it seemed like there was no end to the see of blue, a drum sounded.

It was calling retreat, it was a Yankee drum. The soldiers in blue around me began pulling back and running to their hill.

"Follow them follow them to the boarder if necessary." Jasper yelled. He needed no other words as one we followed, before we had even crested the hill our drums began calling everyone back.

Reluctantly we all turned around and headed back to our side. I could see tents already being set up, I put my hand to my side feeling something wet I pulled it back.

Grunting I saw the blood on my hand, that's right got to fix that. Getting into the camp, I ducked behind a wagon and lifted my shirt.

It didn't look to bad, it was just bleeding. Grabbing a shirt in the back of the wagon I tore it up into shreds and wrapped them around my midsection. Satisfied with it for now I stuffed the rest of the shirt in my bag and another one laying near by.

Standing up I looked around for my tent, I saw Jasper standing outside it looking around. Jogging over to the tent I tried to ignore the pain in my side. Getting closer Jasper caught sight of me, he seemed to sigh in relief.

I came to a stop in front of him, with a smile on my face why was I smiling?

* * *

AN: Hey guys sorry this took so long to get up I've been busy the past few days and thisw as the first chance I had to update. I'm glad everyone is enjoying the story and hope that ya'll will continue reading. TTYL and R&R


	6. Chapter 6

"Glad to see you too, Allen. That was quick thinking out there on the field I owe you my life for that."

"Don't think of it. You saved mine out there so were even."

Jasper laughed at the good nature of my joke and opened the tent flap. "I have to go see some people you go ahead and get some sleep. Any injures you need to see too?"

"No sir" I lied hugging my gun to my side to cover up the blood that had stained my shirt.

"Good and good job tonight as well. Like you said you can handle yourself, seeing someone that small fight so well was quite terrifying." We laughed and with that Jasper left me. Going into my ten I sat down on my cot I sighed.

Getting back up I hissed as the bandage rubbed against my side. "I should find some rubbing alcohol or something." I muttered leaving my tent.

Heading to the medical area I slide behind some boxes. When no one was around I began rummaging through some. More bandages, I grabbed those.

Needles, no chloroform, no, saws, no. Rubbing alcohol here we are. Grabbing a bottle of that I headed back to my ten.

Setting up the stuff on the create Jasper had found for me I took my shirt off. The blood was already seeming through the bandage, I winced at the sight of it.

Undoing the rest bandage I began cleaning the wound. I hissed and cussed under my breath at the pain of it. After using half the bottle of rubbing alcohol I wrapped it back up.

Looking at my uniform I saw I needed to stitch that up before anyone questioned it. It didn't take long to do, considering my mom had me making my own clothes since I was twelve.

Ducking out of my tent I quickly cleaned some of the blood off the uniform. It was difficult, why did blood have to stain so well? Wringing it out the best I could I headed back into my tent.

Pulling my uniform top back on I laid on my cot. I sighed as I relaxed, reaching over I grabbed the rubbing alcohol bottle and stuffed it in my bag. Closing my eyes I drifted off into sleep.

I woke up with a hiss, I had rolled over on my side without thinking.

"Allen what wrong?" Jasper was beside me, before I could answer.

I almost leaned into his chest and started crying. Then I remembered myself "Nothing" I quickly said "A bad dream."

I couldn't see Jasper face but I could feel his disbelief radiating off him. "You sounded like you were in pain, are you sure you're not hurt? That bayonet looked really close to back there."

"No" I lied again "Maybe I hit my hand in the middle of the night or ran it across the wooden cot wrong. I'm fine now really."

Jasper still seemed reluctant to believe me, but let it go. I felt him stand and go back over to his bed. "Alright Allen."

I closed my eyes and waited till I heard the deep easy breathing beside me before I allowed myself to drift asleep.

The next day, I got up early to go to the restroom and change my bandage using the rest of the alcohol. The command was to those who could continue on were to get to the next base and then wait for the rest of the troops to catch up.

Marching today was worse than I had ever gone through, and I thought the heat was bad. Every time my uniform rubbed against my side wrong, it burned. I started carrying my gun on the other shoulder just to keep it from bumping against my side.

Jasper kept glancing down at me, with a look that he suspected. I did my best to keep my face as pain free, but as the day wore on I started getting light headed and it became harder to think.

When we reached the spot of the base, I had never felt so relieved. There were only sixty men in the group, so camp was up in no time.

Once more Jasper had to attend to business before bed, leaving me alone. I pulled a bottle of rubbing alcohol I had snuck from the med supplies while setting up out I lifted my shirt.

I paused seeing that it was bleeding though again, but it wasn't as bad as this morning so that was good.

"Dear God Allen, why didn't you tell me!"

My head snapped up and my eyes meet Jaspers. Before I could say anything he moved over to me and started to grab from my shirt.

"No!" I said pushing his hands away and lowering my shirt "Its fine I got this under control."

Jasper looked angry "What are you talking about?! That should be looked at by a doctor. It's still bleeding."

"No!" I said a little louder "Its fine."

Jasper reached for my shirt again, he can't find out my secret. I pushed his hands away again, this time more frantic I could tell he was only letting me push his hand away out of respect, but he was getting irritated.

"Allen it's ok to be hurt and have help. No one will think less you." He reached for my shirt again this time he didn't move his hands as I pushed them away.

So instead I grabbed my shirt and held on to it.

"Allen" Jasper grunted as I kicked him in the shine. Suddenly my world tilted and I collapsed on the bed. Jasper swore, and bent down over me.

I couldn't fight anymore my world wouldn't stop spinning. I could feel my shirt being lifted off, I tried once more feebly to push him away, but I might as well have not have moved. I felt my shirt go over my head, and Jasper swear.

I closed my eyes, it was obvious what the binds around my chest head down. There was a moment of no movement then two hand began working on my midsection.

I felt the bandages being unwrapped and the sting of rubbing alcohol on the wound. It didn't hurt as much today. Bandages were wrapped around my midsection and I was laid on my back.

I think I passed out after that, the next thing I remember is it being dark out. My head felt clearer and my sided didn't throb as much, I sat up wincing ok so it still hurt.

Swinging my legs over the side I considered getting a drink of water. As though answering my thoughts a tin cup appeared under my nose.

"Here drink." I glanced up and saw Jasper sitting on his bunk, still fully clothed and holding the tin cup.

Grabbing it I drank gratefully. Finishing off the water I held it in my hands, waiting for what ever was to come next.

"I don't know whether to mad at you for lying to me, or admiring because of what you were willing to do."

I didn't look up from the cup.

"Do I get to hear the real story?" This time I did look up, Jasper had a lamp lit on his create, I could see his sky blue eyes clearly.

I looked back down, ashamed to have caused the indecision and pain in them. "If I told you my tale you'd have to kill me." I whispered unable to lie anymore.


	7. Chapter 7

"That would be for me to decided won't it?"

I chuckled bitterly "Nope loyalty would decide that for you, or your commanding officer." Silence consumed us.

Finally Jasper sighed "Don't you trust me?"

Looking up I stared him straight in the eye "With my life."

Jasper held my gaze then nodded "And I you, tell me."

I couldn't hide it anymore, I felt the need to tell him everything he deserved to know more than anyone else.

Taking a breath I began "My name is Alice, I was born and raise in Ohio but my parents were born down in the South."

"You won't happen to be the Alice in scripted on your gun would you?"

I could hear the hint of teasing, I smiled "Yes and it was my older brother's gun, and he was sent home after the being injured in battle. I do have a younger brother but Allen does not exist, it's just me and my two brothers."

Silence then "So what part of all that would force me to kill you?"

Looking down I swallowed "Remember me telling you I didn't fight this war because of a trivial issue such as slavery but for loyalty?

"My younger brother did run off to war, we want him to come home. He has a wife and a kid who doesn't even know him yet. I'm the only thing that could bring him home.

"So I ran off and joined the war hoping some how I'd run into him."

"That doesn't explain why I'd have to kill you."

"My name is Alice Brandon, my brother is Emmett Brandon."

I waited gripping the cup between my hands.

"I still don't see why I need to kill you?"

I leapt to my feet "Are you deaf! I'm the sister of the union pain in the butt. I'm a traitor might as well call me a spy. What else do you want?!" I wanted him to be anger to yell, all he did was sit there and stare at me.

After my rant he waited a few minutes, then calmly stated "I didn't join the war because I believed in the ideals, I joined to fight. You joined to find your brother and hopefully bring him home.

"I don't see why that's reason to kill. I follow orders, that's the only reason I kill in battle, I don't just kill because some one is on the opposite side."

I sat down hard and shook my head "You sit and talk with the enemy as though we were long lost friends. Aren't you afraid I'll run and tell them what you have planned?"

"No."

I stared at him till he continued "You have your own mission, you aren't here to spy or help the war. You're here to find your brother, and I won't stop you from doing what you came to do."

I just continued to stare at Jasper. Deep inside I felt warm that he cared more about my mission than this stupid war. Looking down I blushed, he was so nice.

"Get some sleep Alice, your wound needs energy to heal and you'll get none of that if you stay up talking all night long."

Nodding I laid back down and stared at the tent ceiling. I drifted to sleep wishing my name didn't sound so nice coming off Jasper lips.

The next two week was not exactly awkward, but it they were. When we were around the men, Jasper played big brother to me. Yet at night he always waited till I was settled before he came and went to bed.

He also slept with all his clothes on as well, then in the morning he took all his stuff and went somewhere else giving me the tent.

It was so sweet yet at the same time annoying, I was starting to enjoy being treated like a guy and I missed seeing Jasper without his shirt on.

'What? No, I don't! That's creepy Alice just creepy.'

Anyway Jasper also tried to force me to stay inside and rest. I of course ignored his order. After one day in bed I was restless and had to be out and about.

I was good at avoid Jasper, I didn't want to see his disappointed face. Some days I'd spend mostly in the tent, but mainly I had to be out.

Today was one such day and I was walking by the shooting range when I heard someone call my name.

Turning I saw Douse jogging towards me "Shouldn't you be in bed?" He teased getting closer.

Everyone knew me well enough by now to know I couldn't stay put for long, and they all helped out keeping me away from Jasper.

I smiled "Depends on who you talk to."

Falling into step we continue walking. "Where were you heading anyway?" Douse asked.

I shrugged "I don't know to tell you the truth, just walking mainly."

"Well me and a couple of guys are going to go down to a stream a ways from here. You want to come?"

Go swimming! That would be so nice, I started to say yes then remembered how they would probably swim. I swore under my breath, they would all jump in naked and there was no way I can follow suite.

"Whoa what brought that on?" Douse smiled, that was another thing the other soldiers enjoyed fixing up, my language. I could hold my own before but now I was one of the best, even Emmett couldn't compete with me.

"I can't" I lied sadly it was becoming easier "I have to go and 'rest'. Jasper will be checking on me soon." Which was true, but not for like another four hours.

"Too bad, well see you later." With that Douse ran off.

I wanted to go swimming so bad, I looked toward my tent and then back at the way the guys were running. Making a split decision I took off after them, but kept my distance.

I followed till we got to the stream, then I slipped off down river till I was completely and utterly alone. Going a few more feet just to be sure I slipped out of my clothes and jumped in.

The water was better than I could have imagined. It came up to my chin, which isn't very deep but for me it was perfect. I swam around for a while losing track of time.

Finally I decided I better get heading back, I looked down and noticed the water was slightly red like blood. Checking my side I saw that the wound was completely healed except for a thin scab on it.

What could be bleeding, shoot! I quickly did some math in my head. Dam it, it was my time of month. What was I going to do, I defiantly did NOT have anyway to stop it and I didn't have any extra clothes with me so it didn't bleed through my uniform.

I grabbed my hair then scrubbed my hands over my face before swearing loudly.

"What the…"

I moaned and swore again. Silently prayed I didn't just hear Jasper's voice. Slowly I peeked through my fingers, yep it was Jasper and his back was to me.


	8. Chapter 8

I could see a small part of his face, and it was bright red. "I'm sorry ma'am… I didn't…. sorry." He stuttered out.

Great now he's going all southern gentleman on me. I don't need this right now. I growl in frustration.

"I'll leave" Jasper started to walk away, oh no he doesn't. He is going to help me out of this.

"Don't move" I hissed. Jasper froze, but continued looking the other way. "I don't want to deal with you right now but I need your help. I need some bandages or a shirt I don't care what just get them and bring them here."

Jasper nodded and disappeared. So help me if he didn't come back I would kill him. Ok maybe that was the PMS talking, but I don't know the difference. About ten minutes later Jasper walked backwards into the clearing and laid the bandages down by my clothes.

"Don't go too far." I muttered darkly. He moved to the other side of a tree and waited. Getting out of the water I quickly made basically a diaper and slipped it on. Then I got dressed, stalking over to Jasper I scowled.

He glanced down at me then started walking back to camp. If I didn't need an excuse to scowl I wouldn't have walked back with Jasper, but better it look like I was in trouble than come up with an excuse.

Everyone stayed clear of us as we walked back to our tent. Getting there Jasper let me in first, then followed. As soon as the tent flap dropped, Jasper looked at me with concern eyes. "Are you ok?"

"No." I said flatly hoping he would drop it.

"Why did you need bandages did you wound break open again?"

"NO!" I said a little more loudly than I intended. Going over to my cot I curled up into a ball, as a cramp took me.

"Alice?" Jasper was beside me.

I growled in frustration. "I've got one word, woman."

I heard Jasper fall back against his cot. At least he got the meaning. "Well umm I'm going to go then, I'll bring you dinner…"

I heard the tent flap close, and I sighed in relief. Closing my eyes I just dwelt in my pain. Jasper returned at dinner and left a plate of food for me.

I nibbled on some of it but mainly I just laid there. As night fell I heard Jasper return.

"I told the men that I caught you out of your tent and have confined you with a guard on the outside for the next week."

"That won't be completely necessary." I mutter "Mine only last about four days, and the first day is always the worst. I'll be up and about tomorrow guarantee."

Jasper gave a small oh. Then he said "Well you can learn some patients any way so just stay here."

"Fat chance."

Jasper chuckled "Why doesn't that surprise me?"

I couldn't help but laugh a little.

"My order still stands, regardless if you follow it or not."

"Jasper" I quietly whispered.

"Yes Alice."

"Shut up."

Jasper gave a small chuckle then I heard him get into bed. As promised the next day was fine, still annoyed about what I had to suffer through and PMSing off the wall, but fine.

Douse, and the rest of the guys just thought that I was mad because I was 'ordered' to remain in my tent. Needless to say everyone gave me a wide berth for those four days, well everyone except Jasper.

He seemed to take it upon himself to make sure I was ok every night. It was really sweet and all but I was getting kind of annoyed. The night after my period I blew.

"Alice may I come in" Jasper whispered from the tent flap.

I rolled my eyes "Yes."

Jasper came in "Are you sure you're good? You don't need anything."

"Yes Jasper."

"Well I'll leave you then and…"

"Would you just STOP!" I whirled around and yelled. Jasper looked shocked.

I sigh and try to calm down, but Jasper had to open his mouth "Quite Alice, everyone else doesn't know."

I lost it "Jasper I know! I know! I've known that since I joined the army. SO help me if you don't quite, I my just forget the fact and tell everyone.

"I'm not helpless, you know that so stop treating me like I am." Luckily I was able to keep my voice to an evil hiss.

The shock had finally worn off Jasper and he took up his own front. "Now stop right there little lady, I'm just being respectful like I was brought up to be.

"Your right you can take care of yourself, but that doesn't mean you should be treated like a common soldier or be subjected…well you know."

Always the southern gentleman, "What to their crude language? To their suggestive innuendoes? Or are you talking about to their nakedness? Cuz I've been exposed to them all."

Jasper face turned to stone "When?"

I rolled my eyes honestly did he really not expect it to happen when he wasn't around. I turned my back on Jasper and started stuffing stuff into my bag.

"What are you doing?"

I threw my head back in frustration didn't he know when to shut up? "I'm running away" I said sarcastically "No, I always remain packed just in case. You should know that by now. You watch every part of my life."

Suddenly I was turned around, and Jasper's face was inches from mine and his hands held me still by the elbows. "Only because I care about you"

Before I know what was happening Jasper crushed his lips against mine. I was immobilized for a second, I couldn't comprehend what was going on. Then I began to respond, I pushed myself closer and grabbed his hair intertwining my fingers.

It was so soft. He slide his hands from my elbows to my hips. I shivered in pleasure, and gave a small gasp.

Then he pulled back, panting hard. "I'm sorry, that was uncalled for…"

"Jasper" I growled. He raised an eyebrow. "Shut up."

He smiled and leaned back in. It wasn't as hot as the kiss before but it was still heavenly. As he pulled away for a second time, he sighed "What are we going to do?"


	9. Chapter 9

I knew what he meant, we couldn't really start courting could we. This was going to be awkward. "I don't know." I whispered burying my head in his chest.

I never had realized how much I had wanted held till now. Slowly Jasper released me, I felt so cold with out him. "I guess we could just go back to the way things were."

I felt tears spring to my eyes, I finally had him and now I had to let him go. I nodded I knew better than to speak, besides that was my distained life as a soldier. To be alone.

Walking over to my cot I tossed my bag underneath it and laid on top of it curling into a ball facing the wall.

"Alice?" I didn't turn around. Suddenly I felt someone on the bed with me, a hand stoked my hair.

I couldn't take it I turned around and wrapped my arms around Jasper's waist. Jasper swore and relaxed on my cot "That's not going to work. It hurts to see you sad and I don't think I could keep myself away."

I snuggled closer to Jasper staring at nothing. "We could just keep up with a facade the only thing different would be what happens here in the tent." I whispered.

Jasper chuckled "And I thought you were mature beyond your years. Here it's because you're a woman."

I gently punched him in the side. Soon I drifted off into sleep.

As I slowly gained conscience, I smelled something heavenly. It was such a sweet smell, but it held the roughness and muskiness of a man.

Pulling my arm toward me I began whipping my eyes. Since when did my cot become so…muscular? I shot right up and looked down at a very bemused Jasper.

"Morning. You as surprised as I was?"

I blushed and idly began drawing on his stomach. Somewhere off a bugle sounded, I glared in that direction. The bugler must have felt my glare since he missed a beat.

"Come sweet pixie, let's go to breakfast."

Getting off the bed I threw my bag on my back and left, Jasper was right on my heals. At the chuck wagon I watched as the cook piled something on my plate. I think it was left over from dinner, but I'm not for sure.

Taking it I sat around my usual fire, Jasper sat next to me.

"Hey Allen, sleep well," Douse sat next to me "Some guys near your tent said… opps sorry Major." Douse ducked his head realizing who sat next to me.

"No worries Douse, we worked out our differences." Jasper amended sending me an affectionate glance.

I wrinkled my nose in response. Douse laughed not catching the hidden meaning. "Any way, are you up to swimming today, Allen. The boys are willing to make a special trip since you've been confined these last few days."

I looked thoughtful for a second, before I could come up with an excuse Jasper supplied for my. "Sorry but I have Allen working with me in inventory today."

Douse gave me a sympathetic look and pat my shoulder seeing my sour face. Glaring at Jasper I saw he wasn't looking at me, but rather glaring at Douse. It was then I realized Douse still had his hand on my shoulder pulling my close to whisper in my ear.

"If you slip away we'll wait for you by the trees." I grinned at him, then glanced over my shoulder at Jasper. He wasn't looking at us anymore but he was stabbing pretty hard at his breakfast.

He looked so cute jealous, wait he was jealous because of me. I all most blushed then frowned even if it was cute, it wasn't very becoming. I didn't like the way it furrowed his brow or made him squint hiding his beautiful blue eyes.

Looking back at Douse I shrugged "Probably not, our Major looks kind of pathetic, he had some nightmares last night so he's a little on edge. I'll not upset him today."

Douse looked over at Jasper and shuddered. Even if everyone loved Jasper, no one wanted to make him angry. "You're a brave one Allen, very brave."

With that he got up to tell the guys the news. As soon as he left Jasper got up, "Come on Ali..en lets go do inventory."

I followed stuffing the last of the food in my mouth, it may not look good but tasted amazing. Once we were in the supply tent Jasper gave me a list and pen.

"Jasper" I said quietly in my normal voice. Jasper stopped, I could see half his face he had his eye's closed. "Jasper, don't be jealous it's not becoming of you."

"I'm sorry ma'am."

I held the list close to my chest, I loved it when he said that his accent came out so strong. Jasper began working then, I perched myself on a barrel and wrote what ever he said.

After a while he asked "Have you ever been courted, Alice?"

I had to move the pen away from the paper as I almost wrote that down. "No. The guys in my village were too afraid of me to try."

Jasper looked over his shoulder "Why would they be afraid of you?"

I smiled "Because one guy tried to kiss me at a dance, so I punched him. Laid him out and proceed to do a number on his face."

Jasper chuckled probably trying to image what that would look like. "I can't blame them, when I first saw you beat up that soldier for harassing you about not taking off your uniform I didn't want to mess with you either."

"Does it still scare you?"

"No, I just find it comforting and well now knowing what you really are, kind of cute."

"Fighting is not supposed to be cute regardless if its boy or girl."

"But when you fight it is."

I ducked my head behind the list to cover my blush. We worked the rest of the morning in quite conversation.

I learned that Jasper was an only child and though he loved his parents dearly he was having a hard time at home. His parents wanted him to settle down, be a musician, or a lawyer. He just wanted to be a soldier.

"Can you play?" I asked suddenly.

"A little."

"On what?"

"Guitar."

I snorted "What kind of musician is that?"

Jasper chuckled "That's what I told my parents but they still insisted that piano wasn't that different from the guitar. Besides they figured I could just sing along and that would make everything better."

"Sing me a song." That was random, I mentally kicked myself.

Regardless Jasper began singing _"It is well with my soul."_ As the last note hung in the air, I committed the beautiful baritone sound to heart.

Looking at my paper I realized that we were done, glancing up at Jasper I realized he was lounging on a pile of boxes. I blushed realizing we must have been done for a while, Gah when did I turn all girly girl with all this blushing nonsense.

Hopping off my barrel I brushed off my uniform. "Well, doesn't look like there's much else to do here."

"Nope and it's almost dinner. Let's go grab some food."


	10. Chapter 10

Dinner was uneventful, eventually it was time for bed. Heading to our tent I slip inside.

With out thinking I slipped out of my uniform top to sew a little hole I noticed in the sleeve. I began humming as I sowed, looking up I noticed Jasper facing the tent wall at attention.

"Jasper I have an undershirt on." I smile even though it's annoying it's still cute. Jasper pecked over his shoulder, then cleared his throat and turned around. I continued sowing, glancing up I noticed Jasper shirt had a rip in it too.

With out thinking of a tactful way to ask I demanded "Take your shirt off."

"WHAT!"

I pointed to the hole in it trying not to laugh.

"Right" Jasper slipped out of his top and handed it to me. The next half hour was spent me sowing and Jasper twitching.

"Do you have a twitching problem?"

"No" twitch.

I giggled quietly. Tying off the last stitch I inspect the both shirts one more time for any last minute holes.

Seeing none I handed Jasper's back to him. He reached for it but dropped the shirt due to a twitch. I tried to stifle another giggle and bent down to pick up the shirt.

My hand meet Jasper's just as we grabbed the cloth. Looking up our faces were only inches away. Jasper had stopped twitching nope I lied his eyebrow twitched.

I started laughing, choking is what it sounded like considering I was trying not to. Jasper glared at me then a look entered his eyes.

I stopped laughing real quick, when ever Emmett got that look it meant he was going to do something and it usually involved tackling me. Suddenly I was on my back with Jasper on me.

He held my hands over my head, stretching the shirt over my flatten chest. Bending down he hovered inches over my mouth "You were laughing at an officer. That's against regulation."

"Really?" My breathing was starting to pick up. How could he do this to me?

"In my book it is." Jasper's accent sent shivers down my spine.

"What happens now?"

"You have to pay the price, one kiss."

I didn't even get to respond as he started kissing me. I tried to move but Jasper kept me firmly in place. Slowly he moved down my jaw line and lightly brushed at the hollow of my neck.

Pulling back he just stared at me, I stared back. It was in that moment that I realized with out meaning to I had fallen in love with Jasper Whitlock.

"Alice, I.." he stopped then leaning back down to my ear he whispered "I love you."

My breath hitched but as I exhaled I reveled my realization "I love you too, Jasper Whitlock."

Letting go of my hands, Jasper laid down next to me. I curled up against his side hugging his waist. We were an odd pair of opposites.

He was tall I was short, he from the south I was from the north, he stuck to the code of gentleman I was more…. relaxed. Yet we were still in love, and in unspoken words I know it would last forever.

"Alice, what ever happens know that someday I'll find you. If we ever get separated I'll find you."

"I'll wait for you Jasper Whitlock, no matter if it's a hundred years or forever. I'll wait for you, but mark my words you make we wait forever I'm going to start looking for you."

Jasper laughed "I won't expect any less from you pixie."

Then all hell broke loose.

The drums called everyone to at arms, grabbing my uniform I tugged it on.

Grabbing my gun I ran out of the tent. Jasper was already outside, but we both froze. Our camp was a blaze soldiers were everywhere scrabbling for guns or trying to get away from the union troops.

Suddenly Jasper grabbed my elbow "Take this, remember me and remember I'll find you." He shoved something into my hand, then grabbed a gun and ran off.

"JASPER!" I yelled trying to follow, but his long legs carried him farther and farther away. Stopping I looked at what he gave me, it was a simple cross nothing really fancy about it just a cross.

There was something engraved in it but I couldn't read it in the light. Quickly clasping it around my neck I began heading in the direction Jasper took.

I was stopped every so often by a union soldier but I knocked them out before they could do much. I was in the middle of a battle with one when I heard a roar to my left. I kicked the guy and brought my gun down to knock him out but it was stopped by a different gun.

Looking up I came face to face with my brother. "Emmett?!"

Emmett's POV

This was my atmosphere.

Packs of southern soldiers attempted to bring me down. I had cuts everywhere from their bayonets but none of them could stop me. Looking up from finishing up one of the groups I noticed my best man Lucas being beaten up by a shrimp of a kid.

Though watching the kid fight, he was terrifyingly good and it looked somewhat familiar. No time to think of that now, I roared a laugh and charged at the fight.

The kid kicked Lucas down and raised the butt end of his gun. I was closer now, that gun looked familiar as well. I slide my gun in between Lucas and other one. The kid grunted at being stopped and looked up.

"Emmett?!"

Suddenly I recognized the kid, it was Alice.

"ALICE!" I yelled and drew back.

She looked relieved and hugged me. "I missed you so much. When Edward came home we were so worried about you so I set out to find you. Then my regiment got eliminated, so I had to join the southern army or be killed. I was so afraid I won't find you in time."

I just stood there while Alice babbled on, finally I got enough sense to realized the danger she was in. "Get out of that uniform right now. You can explain yourself later."

She unashamedly took off her top and just stood there in here undershirt. Lucas who was thoroughly confused but could definitely identify what was being bounded down under the shirt turned away in embarrassment.

Grabbing Alice's hand I began pulling her back to our lines. She followed at first then started to resist. "I can't go yet, I have to find Jasper."

"You're going right now." I pulled hard on her hand.

"No!" She screamed.

My only thought was to protect my sister so I scooped her on my shoulder and began running.

"PUT ME DOWN EMMETT!" I swear I could hear tears in her voice, but not Alice.

Then it happened.


	11. Chapter 11

I awoke in the hospital ward my leg bandaged up and a small section of my arm. Sitting up I noticed Emmett in the bed beside me.

Getting off the bed I sat on his. He didn't look to bad. One of his legs was bandaged and so was his midsection. I grabbed a doctor's hand as he walked by "What happened?"

"We found him with some metal in his leg and a gash on his side. Luckily no vital organs were hit. He will be fine, in the future he may have a limp but nothing serious."

I nodded my thanks and began stroking Emmett's hair.

The doctor cleared his throat "Maybe you should be resting as well Ms.. You did suffer a small blow to the head, several cuts to your back, and well I bet you can feel your leg."

"What did happen to my leg?" I ask inspecting the bandage. It came from my ankle all the way up to about mid-thigh. My pants leg was torn to make easy access to the bandage and I had a clean undershirt on.

The man cleared his throat "I don't know if I should tell you. It was quite gruesome."

I laugh "I've seen war, I've had one of my friends die in my arms. I think I can handle what happened to my leg. Besides it doesn't feel that bad."

The doctor look extremely uncomfortable, he reminded me of Jasper when he was trying not to look at me when I changed. I quickly swallowed keeping the tears in my eyes.

"Well we believe it was cut open by a discarded bayonet, it was a clean cut not very deep but it will leave a scar. Now please get back into bed before you pass out Ms.."

"EXCUSE ME! Are you insinuating that I'm going to pass out because I got a small cut on my leg?!" I glare at the young doctor, who looks everywhere but at me.

"No Ms., but I think you really should…"

I jump up now and even though I'm a head shorter than the guy he backs up like I'm taller. "I have suffered a concussion this little headache is nothing. I actually feel great, so you can think what ever you want, but mark my words. Nothing short of sedation will keep me in that confound bed over there."

I soft chuckle sounded behind me. Looking back I saw Emmett struggling to sit up, I quickly push him back down. He glared at me then smiled "Trust me Morry, she's tell the truth. I'd let the issue go, before you really tick her off."

I smile fondly at Emmett, glancing at the doctor I saw him shuffle around a little bit. Fixing a death glare at him he quickly scampered away.

Emmett chuckled "Glad to know that you haven't lost your touch little sister."

"Thanks you." I smile glad to finally have my brother safe and sound. "I'm taking you home the minute they say your fit enough to be moved."

Emmett looked pained for a moment but I held up a finger. "Before you protest let me set the facts out for you.

"One your are in no condition to fight, two it will take months for you to heal enough to even fight, three you left Rose at home all alone to raise your son, and four that boy need you right now more than this stupid war does.

"Now I will hear your arguments." I knew there wouldn't be any, but I opened the floor anyway.

"My..my..son?" Emmett stuttered eyes wide.

I smile fondly at him "Yes he was born about eight months after you left. Rose named him Emmett Edward Brandon."

"I have a son?!" Emmett's face lit up and he let out a loud whoop. Then he winced as it moved his side.

"Relax little brother I'm going to go for a walk."

"Shouldn't you be resting as well?" Emmett closed his eyes.

"Maybe but I can't sleep I feel restless."

Emmett chuckled "Why doesn't that surprise me?"

Patting his shoulder a little more harder than necessary and I got up. Heading out of the tent I headed to a group of soldiers. One of them looked up as I approached and quickly nudged the other guys.

All of them adverted their eyes, so that none of them were looking at me. I looked down and noticed my clothes, men were really getting on my nerves.

Rolling my eyes I continue with my mission "Excuse me but was a Major Jasper Whitlock taken as a prisoner?"

The one who noticed me first answered "We don't know Ms., they don't share that kind of information with us."

"Who would know?" I was getting impatient with all this Ms. stuff.

"Maybe you should wait till you feel better and have…"

"Don't even dare finish that sentence and tell me who your commanding officer is." I hissed.

"General Wester Ms." The guy even saluted me because he was so surprised.

"And where can I find him."

"Probably going at the chuck wagon Ms., General Wester never misses a meal."

"Thank you." With that I took off toward the chuck wagon. Every where soldiers diverted their eyes or turned around.

Finally I reached the wagon, there was this rather large officer eating at a table. I instantly disliked him, the way he separated himself from the soldiers, acted all high and mighty, and ate enough for a family.

He was nothing compared to Jasper, I had to find him. Walking up to the man I stood waiting to acknowledged. It didn't take long I seemed to be very noticeable in the camp.

He looked up and shock covered his face, then lust. It was all I could do not to slap his face. "So you're the little lady who joined the war? General Wester, at your service."

I nod curtly "I was curious if a Jasper Whitlock was captured and taken prisoner sir."

"I'm sorry little lady but we don't take prisoners in this unit. If he's still alive which I highly doubt he would have high tailed it back to his hole in the ground. Don't you worry any about him, would you like something to eat?"

No prisoners, my hope faded. He was dead. I turn not even bothering to answer the Generals question I just walked back to the med tent and laid down. He promised he'd find me, but there were no prisoners.

Then I remembered that fateful day I met Jasper, I was supposed to be dead. It was a spark of hope, but it at least was something.

Looking down I saw the necklace, and the inscription. "I will always find you." I did start crying then, it was as though fate had known about us before we even knew.


	12. Chapter 12

I"M SO SORRY! I wanted to update this sooner but last week I got sick and was flat on my back the whole week unable to do anything except stare at the ceiling. Then i finally get better only problem was we have one good computer i trust to upload stories from without to much of a glich or taking six million years to process, and it was occupied by my family playing WoW. The past four days has been if your not playing WoW get off the computer. Well end of story here it is!

* * *

A month later I took Emmett home, it was a teary reunion I got a couple harsh words but for the most part everyone was happy.

After all our wounds were properly healed and scared Edward Emmett and me snuck off and compared.

I had the longest one going from mid thigh all the way to just above my ankle, Emmett had the coolest it looked like a bear, but Edward's was the biggest covering his entire side and shoulder it just look like his skin was paler on that half the body.

It was good to have my brothers home, it was good to be home. Emmett spent every waking moment with his son, and Rose never let either out of her sight.

Bella and Edward got married and are working on building their own house in between ours and Emmett's. Everyone was proud of us for fighting and coming home, but everyone was still wary of me.

All the old ladies were still desperately trying to get me to settle down, thinking I must have been taken advantaged by some one out there. Stupid old busybodies.

I sighed paying for the last of the grocery, a group of guys were attempting to get one of them to come over and ask me to dance.

Naturally all of them were afraid, why blame them I fought in a war who knows what I can do now.

It had been almost a year and half since I came home, a year since the war ended. My hair had grown to my shoulders now, it still had a ways to go before it was anywhere as long as Bella's.

Though I kind of like it short it was easy to mange and doesn't get in my way as much. I think I might cut it, why not no ones going to marry me anyway.

Leaving the store I went back to our house. Handing the basket off, I did my chores. I was milking Betty so that I had a clear view of the road.

The sun was setting, it was during this time I would look. Just look out and see if by chance today he would come. Naturally he never did, everyone told me to move on but how can you move on when your heart is missing.

Edward and Emmett were uneased when I finally told them everything, but the more I talked about him the more comfortable they accepted the fact I was in love.

I finished milking Betty and set the pail inside the door for mom. Going to the pump I washed my hands.

Walking back to the road I just stood and looked out. "I'm still waiting, soldier." I pretend to be anger then I can't help but bite back the tears. "Come home Jasper."

I start to turn away, when the notes of _"It is well with my soul"_ reached my ears. Turning back to the road, I saw a loan figure walking down it.

The baritone was so familiar to me, I was frozen. In fear that I was wrong, in hopes that I was right. Slowly the figure came closer, I couldn't deny it now his built the way he ducked his head to every lady in town.

"JASPER!" I scream picking up my skirts I ran. His head had snapped up at the sound of his name, I could see the honey colored hair now.

He picked up his pass I little, of course to him it was a brisk walk to anyone else it would have been a jog. I could see his sky blue eyes, they were perfect, and they shone with joy and love.

I jumped into his arms, tear slipping down my face. He held me, my feet a good foot off the ground.

Finally I controlled myself enough to mutter "You kept me waiting."

"I'm sorry ma'am." His voice was husky with emotions.

Pulling back I kissed him, I don't care if the old ladies have a heart attack, my love was home and safe.

Epilog

It had turned out Jasper was blown back from a canon ball, and knocked unconscious behind a tree. The Union soldiers sent to make sure everyone was dead, skipped over him when he didn't respond to a boot in the side.

When Jasper came too, he could see that the battle was lost and he was most likely counted dead. Taking it for all it was worth, he headed north.

First he went Indiana, found a job and worked the rest of the war there. After working a few more weeks he took all his money and few possessions and headed to Ohio, in search for me.

It didn't take long, considering word of what I had done had spread through out Ohio, stupid old busybodies.

After introducing him to my family, who thank the heavens accepted him immediately, we got married and built our own little house just beyond Emmett's. There we lived, with three children of our own, and I think it's safe to say...

* * *

Happily ever after. *Sniff* I don't think I can say much except thanks for all the encouragment and help you guys have provided along the way. I already miss this story....I think I might cry yet...JK I don't like crying much but I am going to miss this story. Glad you were here and thanks again!

Till my next story


End file.
